You wonder what they think of my statement: Not everyone has the talent to become a musician? I can’t imagine they disagree. Do you think they’d reply: “Anybody can become a good classical musician as long as he’s willing to put forth the necessary effort”? That statement doesn’t hold true in other arts such as painting, it doesn’t hold true in sports, and it doesn’t hold true in intellectual endeavors such as earning a degree in electrical engineering or in physics.
People vary in their natural ability (talent) to learn at a rate which is sufficient to keep up with the workload they are given by their professors in college, to keep up with the other students in art school, or to keep up with the amount of improvement the other guys on their sports team are showing.
If, for example, one aspires to be a baseball player, and no matter how much work he puts into attempting to improve he continues season by season, to fall further and further behind his teammates in ability, eventually one year he’s not going to make the team. It would be doing a disservice to that kid for his father to tell him, “You can achieve anything you want. If you really want to be a pro or at least a semi-pro ballplayer when you grow up, then just work harder than you’re working. You’re already practicing twice as much as anybody else on the team and they just cut you from them. So don’t give up; practice three times more than they do! I’ll send you to a baseball camp where you’ll do nothing but play baseball al summer long. Whatever to takes to kale the team next year, I’ll help you do it.”
That kid is eventually going to find out that there will be other kids at baseball camp who not only practice just as much as he does, but they have more natural ability and that leads to their practice time yielding far more progress than his own practice time yields. You could apply a similar scenario to a kid who is struggling in high school honors English or honors Chemistry or Physics with the hopes of getting into an Ivy League University.
The end result is that no matter how much more time the kid spends practicing baseball than most of his teammates do, and no matter how much more time the kid with the dream of making it into an Ivy League school spends studies every night than his classmates do, eventually they’re both going to reach a point where no amount of extra work is going to make up for his lack of talent for his chosen field of endeavor. It’s going to be very demoralizing to the kid when he ultimately comes to the realization that he simply doesn’t have what it takes to achieve his goal.
It would have been far better if his father had told him early on “If you want to keep playing baseball with your friends just for the fun of it, great, but don’t even think about trying to make a career out of it. If you were the best baseball player you knew, the best for your age in our county or at least our town, I’d tell you that you might have a shot at playing professional baseball one day. It’s just such a competitive field, there are just so many kids who want to do that when they grow up that unless you were the best player you knew, you just don’t have a shot at making it. Even if you were the best player you knew that might not be enough, That’s how competitive a field it is.” The conversation the father of the kid who is studying as hard as he can and barely getting C’s in his high school honor courses curriculum yet still hoping to make it into Harvard or Stanford, would be a conversation that would hopefully go about the same way…
It may sound cruel to the kid at the time to hear the truth from his father but trust me, in the long run, that talk the father should have with his son will avoid heartbreak of a far greater magnitude than whatever disappointment the kid may be feeling now. Not only does the father having an honest talk with his son avoid a tremendous amount of heartbreak later on, it also gives the son time to find something he both likes and has talent for while he’s still young enough to put in the years of practice or studying depending upon what his new field of endeavor is so that he can do it while he’s still young enough to do it.