Wow! I don’t know how you can diagnose this stuff without even hearing it - years of practice I guess Troy. I was playing around again with it tonight and realised there was a slight error with the string change - I wouldn’t call it a “hop” but I wasn’t pushing through enough - so a very slight hop you could say. But it was enough to make the lick sound not-Yngwie enough - even though I was playing it relatively cleanly. So I tried pushing through and getting to the high E string that fraction faster - and this let the accents etc. all fall into place - the lick started to come together. I was overthinking it and it turned out to be a slight mechanic correction after all. Thanks again!
Thanks for the reply vonbladet - and indeed it seems I wasn’t yet sweeping sweetly enough for it all to fall into place. I worked really hard on the post-sweep chunk - but couldn’t get it sounding right. Then I got the sweep better by pushing through more and it kind of all fell into place.
Yes I agree this is (as one of my old bosses in tech use to say) “non-trivial”! lol But as Troy, yourself and others have encouraged here - “non trivial” does not mean impossible.